I came back to the apartment and he was waiting for me, covered in mustard.
needless to say I left
You should dream of me :)
I'm going to dream of single life.
what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics"
Had to awkwardly dig through all my fake ID's to get my real one so I could vote.......Model citizen over here.
We're celebrating his weight gain and arrest.and by we I mean I, and by celebrating I mean getting dangerously drunk
After the baby comes, I'll make us White Russians with my breast milk. That will teach her about sharing.
I'm glad they extended train service last night. People crying, screaming, throwing up, fighting and peeing themselves on a train made me feel like I've got my shit together.
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
I puked in a solo cup and then offered it to him. So yeah, it was a rough night.
YOU WERE HAVING SEX IN THE SAME BED I WAS SLEEPING IN. AND YOU GRABBED MY HAIR. OF COURSE I'M PISSED.
I think he's speaking German to me now
Nevermind, he's just drunk and not texting properly
when you come home i just want to let you know we are cats now. and we are out of eggs.
Like I'm not tryna become president or marry a doctor or some shit here, like one level above garbage is all I'm asking for
He was like the most intimidating looking guy you've seen in your life except he was really shittily doing the two step
Randomize
