Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
i think blowjobs on the first date are perfectly acceptable. as long as you dont go dick to mouth.
I just bought a vibrating toothbrush with my parents FSA insurance card because I'm too broke for a vibrator. New.Level.Of.Low.
He was like a Bill Nye the science guy of sex....he was telling me things about my clitoris that I didn't even know
We were gonna play Truth or Dare but like 10 minutes in we decided to get naked and play Dare or Get the fuck out.
Dude, you sent that text at 9:44 AM. Who thinks of drugs that early?
Ripped as fuck driving to get a portrait of my cat tattooed on my arm
Drinking Hot Toddies on the Porch and blasting bob dylans "hurricane" bring it on sandy!
I heard moaning and ass slapping and sponge bob.
Who knew there were so many rules and judgements about laying on a kitchen floor. I'm all like I'm resting. It just happens to be on a kitchen floor.
ON A SIMILAR NOTE MY DICK SIZE PSYCHIC SKILLS ARE SO GOOD
Package arrived for me from the gf while she's on vacation..under the bed bondage kit and new lingerie...my boner could drive to the airport
I said "sucks to suck" to a cop last night. We've been snapchatting.
He stopped mid sex to pour wine in my mouth...
Marry him.
He asked me if I want to play Uber Driver, is this some new sex game or is he drunk and asking for a ride home?
Randomize
