Beer is about to convince me to do something really stupid.
i am literally watching eva make a trashbag diaper for you to sleep in tonight. whole new level of low for you.
apparently i was cut off before i even walked in
Ps. I feel like I may pee myself this weekend. Either drunkenly or out of excitement. Toss up
So roofie roulette was a success but I'm a little worried that the 2 who got the tainted beer still haven't contacted anyone...
Dude imagine how many pictures of dicks Obama gets. That can't be unusual. Almost every kids in the US has written the president a letter.
The nausea has returned and I can't handle such things to exit my body so violently
So you're mad that you saw a penis at a swinger's party? That's rational
So what's the moral standing on reading gay porn on your phone whilst sitting next to your 87 year old Grandma?
She's like a solid nine. Well maybe not a tomorrow morning nine, but she's a nine right now and trying to take me home.
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
so like
i may have gotten a little bit of blood in the charging port of my phone
Sorry for trying to wake you up by slapping your ass with a fruit 2 go.
We could just go to Vegas and celebrate my singlehood and not contributing to the population.
The waxing lady fingered me during my brazilian. 40 dollars well spent
Randomize