do you know how bad I want you right now?
As bad as i want you to stop texting me?
is that a hint?
chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
well i had to explain to their mom why the kids i babysit for won't stop repeating the phrase "nice juicy guido"
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
Apparently I walked to Denny's in the pouring rain without shoes just socks last night. Excellent.
Can we talk about how i am holding a tupperware container of my own puke in the back of my grandparents car while my sister drives
i know. like I have the nerve to talk about poverty. I eat peanut butter out of the jar.
that pic of me and the hulking football player sure does come in handy when creepy guys hit on me at the bar.
I woke up and there was pizza slices on the fucking walls of my room
seriously, who doesn't want to get shitfaced and have sex to the backstreet boys?
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
Life update - currently drunk off my ass in the yoga room of SFO at 5:30 in the morning.
I am the murdurer of this scooby doo episode
Oh dear God, they have a song about Mom...
The sex was so good I feel like I could run a triathlon, hit big at the casino, and defeat ISIS.
Randomize
