Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
I would blow Magic Johnson for a pack of lucky strikes right now. Post-hiv.
You probably shouldn't be hiding under someones bed listening to them get head
It took me 40.8 seconds to take a dump at her house, I know because I timed myself.
this is ridiculous... i look like a white version of MC Hammer...
I'm at a party watching some dude try to eat a whole package of Oreos in 5 minutes.
you can feel better about your life now. i slept with a guy who has gold teeth
It's okay, I found my phone in the toaster oven. Logical explanation: 5 martinis
So I'm drunk playing pool in a bar with a guy I arrested last week for a DUI...if he recognizes me, shit's gonna get real.
You know this who 'I show my love by being a total dick' thing is getting old, right?
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
if you arent using your penis to save lives, then what good is it?
Not exactly hook line and sinker right away, but I'll give him a second chance. I should sext him me in my blue shark onesie.
Yes but I said "let's get a dog" not a drunk human so some rules will be established this evening
You can cuddle me. Word on the street is my ass is ridiculous.
Randomize
