So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
you think thats bad? Today I had to pop a zit on my sack.
She just got back from rehab. You dont celebrate that with margaritas.
He left an unopened 12 pack of beer by my bed. I guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex..
just had cupcakes and mountain dew for dinner-now i'm playing super mario brothers. 10 year olds all over the world would kill to be me.
Just coat-checked 2 backpacks full of 40's...it was the bouncer's idea.
I gave you head at the stadium on a Thursday night ESPN game. That damn well better be worth points on the score board!!!
my roommate just showed me the scar on her forehead... that she got from a shake weight... That. just. happened.
I really hope you are not drunk feeding a raccoon.
I just bought 7 working mopeds off a guy for $300. We are 60% of the way to our gay biker gang dream.
Whoa, I am aware of WAY too many squirrels right now...
I just replaced the poop spray with an air horn... Now we wait!
Even dream me is a champ at smoking weed
Let's go one conversation without mentioning cats or alcohol someday.
do you think there's enough of the fabric you gave me to make a crop top for a cat?
Randomize
