I'm sorry..where i come from learning how to exploit a wealthy middle aged man is a right of passage
You look at her and you just know the only action she's gotten is from her tampon..
DUUUDE!! just found out that the fbi has a kids page. guess who's got a new jumior officer printout badge?
Hold on im havin a staring contest with my cat
he saw my boobs and came all over himself... there goes my whole night.
But fine, we can play that game. You can come over and we can have totally platonic, long, boring discussions. Or we can fuck. Whatever.
He just tagged everyone he's slept with this year in a 'memories of 2011' tweet
I only feel half bad for cheating on him because while we were fucking I was given great relationship advice and now I'm ready to work some things out.
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
I'm convinced that college is the only place where one can have an existential crisis over what sweatpants to wear
I tried to talk to him, but he didn't recognize me at first. I had to show him the top of my head and then he remembered.
After seeing all of the pics during the trial, all I could think was "her vagina doesn't look THAT dangerous"
I've drank literally 19 beers and am still good. Utah is worthless
You got naked in his car? Or the koala suit was in his car? One of those sounds a lot less slutty than the other......
I mean the power was out what was I supposed to do
Randomize
