The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
man, i hate rosetta stone. i wanted to impress this girl with italian last night but all i could say were things like "a blue airplane" and "he is wearing a white shirt"
the "happy anniversary" cake for my mom and dad is about to turn into the "yeah, that's a hickey, welcome back from italy" cake.
He is an equal opportunity slut.
a man that wears gold spandex underwear and party boys other people is a man after my own heart.
I am going to be the most sexually active ladybug that he has ever seen
So the "just a friend" kid confessed his love for me...sometimes I hate how awesome I am.
I almost punched the night nurse in her face. I woke up and she was standing over me.
My three rules on what I'm wearing tonight. Something short, something see through, and something i had sex in.
I'm laying in bed with a case of beer,.. That's how this break up is going..
I'm glad I get the same reaction from you for cookies and for my naked body
And the cops are back. At least my pants are on this time
I find celibacy oppressive. Huge waste of my time and talents.
You were staring right at you dick at the urinals, then looked at all the other guys dicks and fist pumped saying "I win!"
I just found three upside down bottles of grapejuice in a triangle around the air freshener above my toilet... I guess it was one of those nights
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