we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
My vagina is so ashamed right now. It won't even look at me.
yeah he didnt know till after their one year. You have no idea how bad i wanna say "dude i sucked on those boobs before you"
plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
found the other keg... it's in the tree
I can't believe i facilitated a beer for sweater vest deal last night...
we didnt even make it to the club...the two of us were sharing a plastc bag in the taxi puking into it.
Well, I now know how many glasses of wine it takes for me to fuck my neighbor.
Oh wow. Was walking and just saw her in the pool, fully clothed, ranting on an alligator float. I guess i should go get her before security gets here.
Sitting in my kitchen at 3am, craving dick and eating peanut butter instead. I'm not sure how I feel about being 27.
I saved a note for myself but all it said was "am I a slutty Holden Caulfield?"
I know. I know. He'll be weekday dick.
The people around me on the bus dont know im wearing glowsticks under my clothes. I feel like a super hero.
No, he came home, unscrewed all of the lightbulbs, and threw them in the sink.
He's a downgrade and it was quick. But it was dick nonetheless.
Randomize
