There's just this way he looks at me that makes me want to suck his soul out through his dick.
She made Precious look like a solid 6.5.
Just registered some guy for opium withdrawals. WTF opium withdrawals, who does opium anymore.
she wants me to meet her parents and she hasn't even met my penis yet.
Today I learned you can't titshake with a corset on.
My dads not up on pop culture but he's not dumb enough to believe your 2 girls 1 cup reference at dinner was from the bible.
Now I don't feel so bad about telling everyone that he's 23 and needs Viagra. It's her problem now
Bailey. He has a soul patch. Idgaf if he was an NFL player. Nobody with a soul patch is attractive.
The walk home lasted longer than the sex. He lives in the flat above the bar.
i rearranged my furniture so i could masturbate in the sun. how's that for spring cleaning?
I saved a note for myself but all it said was "am I a slutty Holden Caulfield?"
How old am I that I had to sneak a boy out of my room this morning...
He sent me a meme at 3am. Usually guys just send me booty calls that late. I think I'm in love
He unofficially told me he deleted his tinder because of me. I think that’s a pretty romantic gesture in 2018
Ik youre sleeping but fyi its 5:32am I'm sitting in the middle of the road bra less and shoeless with boxers in my hand and no ride. Shits real crazy.
Randomize