Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
she asked if mt Rushmore was natural or man made
I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
She checked into foursquare right as she left work so he would think she was there late and not on some other guy's dick
I have to say for barely passing high school, that girl is a genius.
oh my god, there is an imprint from the nuva ring in the christmas card my mom sent me. merry christmas.
We learned a lot about one another. I showed him around the town I grew up in and he informed me that he has had a threesome and killed a cat
You offered me some of your "Jungle Juice." It was just 151 and Absinthe. I don't know how you are still alive.
He left an apology note saying he had to work and that there was coffee, OJ and food on the table with two Excedrin. I left his spare key with the door guard and she said "too bad I don't go for skinny white boys or I'd jump you both!" Best one night stand ever.
it's ok my mom asked me why i had a guys shirt on and also why there was chocolate all over my bra
Side note: the physics of a guy my size and age getting laid in the backseat of a Toyota Camry are absolutely staggering
I threw up off of your balcony and it must have been loud because the dog downstairs went insane.
I thought I would be a proper lady and put my spare panties in a ziplock
Do not try to steal a picnic table from a park, all you will end up with are sore arms and broken dreams.
Only thing I have going for me is jacking off, weed, and saturdays
My horoscope should say: you're an alcoholic, get help today, Pisces
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