ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
Spotted on freeway- girl in ford focus takes a hit from a 7 inch pipe while knee driving. She winked at me. I want her life.
Last night my friend tried to make out with me in an olive garden. Ahahah
Nothing says 'I love you' like never ending salad and breadsticks
Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
I'm going on a nature/throwup walk. Don't lock me out of the apartment.
i made potato chips in weed oil. what did you do today?
I don't know how, but he made a bong out of a hamster wheel. To say I am impressed is an understatement.
If he tries to stick his thumb up my butt again im going to rip his dick off with my vagina
I told you those kegels would come in handy one day
I asked him how his night was and he sent me a picture of a bottle of Ciroc with a bendy straw...
Bar selfie Saturday turned into bar nudie Saturday in a hurry. I need to delete my snapchat...
I got into a fight with the dude who fell asleep on my couch bc he wouldn't wake up but managed to get a lunch date set for thurs with another guy by the time he finally left. So how's your day so far?
10 shots in she's sitting on the floor using the open dishwasher door as a plate to eat her "life giving" pizza.
When's the best time to point out that all of my orgasms this year have been self-administered? Valentine's day?
college girl with braces trying to flirt with you...time to go
Randomize