things it involved: vodka, boy parts, possible photos of me on a cell phone. things it did NOT involve last night: my bra, his pants, and sobriety.
um i just realized that some of the people at my family reunion look inbred. thats not a good sign.
hahaha beady eyes set close together? defs inbred.
my dads cousin just put a cig in his dogs mouth and says, "look its a commercial for newport!" holy hell i hope im adopted.
So we fuck and I say, "I'm about to go." He tells me, "No, leave at ten.. just lay here for a little while." When I ask, "Why?!" He gets his feelings hurt and says, "ugh. or don't." Since when did guys start acting like girls?
I just saw a kid drop his lollipop on the floor of best buy, kick it because he was pissed off and then pick it up and eat it. I think I have a long lost son.
He bought me a flower. He's totally getting head every day for a week.
You can't have your penis and eat it, too.
One my way home. There was too much fog, strobe lights, and cocaine for my taste.
It's like a booty call, except its for tacos...and you're my brother.
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
I didn't think I was even that high but when we were standing in the cop car's headlights I totally forgot how to use my arms
I'm just going to ride dicks all the way to the to the gates of hell
I promise not to pretend to be Jesus and take the wheel. But to my credit you shouldn't be saying that while I'm that drunk and we are in a car.
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
Dude, don't beat around the bush. We're fucked and you know it.
He has me blocked on facebook.... so I stalked him using my cats fan page.
Randomize
