She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
so he expects you to be his vegas whore for the season. nice.
I like your house better though. Cause it has febreeze and lube.
I don't think you have any idea how kinky that sounds.
his dick makes me think maybe a monogamous relationship forever is possible.
I have Retrograde Ejaculation as a side effect from one of my meds. Is this a respectable form of birth control?
Welp. I just hopped out of his window to avoid meeting his parents... happy monday!
The only reason I'd ever want a boyfriend is so that someone would spoon feed me applesauce when I'm so hungover I can't move
Mom looked at me, frowned, and said "it makes me sad to see you drink before noon.." So i told her if she doesn't like it she needs to stop waking me up before noon.
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
Why was I lying under a truck last night?
is that a dick in a sweater?
Okay everything with a penis is officially dead in my eyes
Rule number 1 of dorm living: do not forget your butt plug in the bathroom.
It was like I was gay for pay but except being gay I became straight and instead of for pay it was for coke.
We got high, had sex, and watched retro scooby doo shows. Best friends with benefits yet.
Randomize