So, halfway through sex he stops and starts crying. He said he's worried god hates him for all his bad decisions...think he meant to imply I was one of them...
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
I am so getting Plan B when we get home. Not getting knocked up by a dude with a hair piece.
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
I just remember thinking that if i ran really fast through the house, no one would notice i was naked.
why didn't you tell me his penis tasted like oreos?
Lets play hurricane shelter. And the shelter is my bed, and we forgot our clothes.
He never answered about passing his structures test no matter how I asked him. He did send a text saying that he would be "pouring alcohol into his head and balls" so I'm guessing he has to retake the whole class.
Watermelon juice. Makes everything better. Gin. Wine. EVERYTHING.
If by "Are you high?" u mean "Did you just pass out at Genghis Grill walking to your table and falceplant?" the answer is yes.
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
She pretty much spent NYE measuring dicks, trying to decide which one to take home.
I'm six Popsicles away from an existential breakdown.
We kept having to tell you that you couldn't just sit wherever you wanted at Walmart. Sitting in the middle of the raw meat section was unacceptable and children were staring at you.
i'm really sorry, but i'm just not sober enough to make good decisions.
Randomize
