Yea well when i pee it makes steam.
It's like a parade of train wrecks.
there should be a rule- if you jizz on it, you wash it
Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
Being high is an amazing excuse. I was using him for the potential of a beret, come on. I'd do that sober.
Is 'too horny to study' a good enough medical excuse to not take a final?
My night consisted of weed, sex, and Mexican food. In that order. I think we found the keys to saving our marriage.
It might have taken me 30 minutes but I finally finished the toast I made. That hungover.
She has "Massive Shits" listed as a turn off. That's very specific and there's a story behind it I bet.
Sweet, got a date tomorrow night
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
I walked into my house with my pants inside out, no shoes and a limp. My mom asked me if I had fun but I passed out before I could reply...
Because my vagina is Ellis Island. All foreign penises must be presented for inspection and competency. God bless America.
I came back from England with a face tattoo and the only thing anyone can talk about is my beard.
Is Facebook telling the truth about your nipples?!
Dude. I just got a visual of u climbing over a bathroom stall to save my life.
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