community service is like the breakfast club... except we're all the criminal.
We've reached that awkward stage of the relationship where he's in love with me when he's drunk, but sober him is still afraid of commitment.
Her virginity is one of the last things that remains of our childhood.
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
Just found the last picture of me as a virgin. Framed it.
you're the one asking for my vibrator at 4 in the morning so reconsider your life
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
First night sober since New Years. I'm not sure what hurts more, the hangover or the credit dread when I find out what the tickets to Bali actually cost.
I'm going to miss hockey season. It was the best excuse to get drunk on a Tuesday night.
Last night you snap chatted some chick a pic of bottle service with the caption "send tits"
Yeah started playing at the wedding last night, when the line. "Ludacris fills cups like DD" he starts pointing at my tits right in front of his grandparents.
woke up and somehow me leather belt got torn in half. either we partied with the hulk or some chick just could not wait to see my dick. probably the former tho
Named all the presidents in order between puke sessions while semi conscious so that's a thing I can do now
and idk now I have nine bags of lettuce in my fridge
if wiping your ass w an envelope isnt the definition of hitting "financial rock bottom " then nothing is!
Randomize
