Did you go home with that guy without me?
Sorry boo - it's pouring and I found a boy with a car
i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
Do you think I can haggle my way to discounted weed on 4.21?
Theres just something about looking at pictures of your dick in church that doesn't feel right
I've gone to the bathroom 3 times. And forgot to pee. 3 times. Let's say we call it a night, I need to be found. I see a fish tank by the bar and some stairs.
votre penis est TRES GRAND. i used vous because your penis is SO big
Hello you've reached the get a clue corp. Our business hours are from take a hint to figure it out, eastern standard time. If you prefer to leave a message, don't, call back when you're not crazy, fat, and annoying.
We just had father kitten bonding time .. I was on the toilet , he was climbing the animal print shower curtain . It was magical
You should have totally come, I started watering down vodka with cider. I have lost the sense of taste.
Dude! I just figured out I can successfully hide a 4oz flask between my boobs without endangering my cleavage! College: conquered!
You know how I said I'd never worry about my roommate? Well I just walked in on her masturbating to Star Trek.
Did she boldly cum where no one has cum before?
I got my first tattoo & injured myself while having sex in a national monument. I say we consider this weekend siezed.
Did you really just call a picture of your erect penis art?
Literally too hungover to clean. I'll get the frosting off the table tomorrow, ok?
sorry for any reference made toward your boobs or making you feel pregnant or incapable of peeing. make it a wonderful day.
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