pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
Me hooking up with her is like rush being president. Bad news.
we sixty- nined on a tennis court.. not even drunk. you say insane. i say creative genius.
Sorry for trying to force you and Robert to make out. I didn't realize how awkward it was until I woke up today.
Nothing says "I forgive you for puking on me during sex" like a Facebook add the next morning...
Don't make fun of the drunk girl eating bread out of her pockets. I've been that girl.
But he buys me breakfast and goes down on me THATS HARD TO FIND
That commercial was clearly aspirational. I think Arbor Mist would pair nicely with Oscar Meyer
I'm really stoned in my underwear. I probably won't make it to the bar.
You're wrong. It's my BIRTHDAY. We all know it's impossible to get pregnant on my diva day!
I'm literally taking a shit naked holding a bottle of wine.
Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron
I just had some kinky fun in the back seat of my car behind a Ralph's in south county. How's your thanksgiving eve?
Three Asian guys got on the elevator with a handle of Hennessey and a sleeping bag. This is not the start of a joke.
Okay first of all, that is a sick ass nickname please call me that forever. Second, i need your help.
Randomize
