9 am. shotgunning while conditioning my hair. i love college football season.
All you kept saying was "my dick ALWAYS causes problems".
Thanks for not cleaning the drain like you were supposed to. I just vomited in the shower and I had to stand in it until I was done conditioning.
I swear I could audibly hear her vagina slam shut when you walked up to hit on her.
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
I bruised my vagina when I was climbing out of the trash can.
Okay so my USC tutor just offered to eat me out. I think I'm definitely applying to USC.
So my mind was like YOU ARE TOTALLY GONNA MAKE IT TO CLASS TODAY but then my body was all LOL NO YOU AIN'T.
Just turned down sex because it's a holy day of obligation, my mom would be proud.
My suggestion is that you just get high and set shit on fire
he had hair everywhere except his balls
We should buy t shirt guns and blow eggs out of them at his house. Bachelorette party
At one point in the night, as we were running from the cops, I clearly remember you yelling "little gnomes are tickling the insides of my body!" ...that high.
How's the party?
I'm watching two people get flogged. Sothere's that.
The only food I have to eat is weed gummies and magic mushrooms... This is peak 34
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