i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
Just witnessed a fat girl fall off the treadmill, pop a medicine ball, and drink coke out of a water bottle all in one workout.
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
IM PICKING UP BLOW FOR US STOP WHINING ABOUT SEX
Is percocet and coffee considered a balanced breakfast?
I should start handing out wavers before I have sex with someone. 1. Do you have anything to do tomorrow? 2. Are you ok with sleeping 12 hours from exhaustion. 3. Are you ok with a limp?
foreskin is a definite game changer
I think I am calling out of work due to a hangover. I'm 96% sure there ISN'T tampon stuck inside me.
Yeah then she waddled like a duck in silence sat down and ate the entire paper towel roll.
Dude, jerking off when you're all hopped up on pre workout energy supplements has got to be the greatest thing I've ever done.
Did you go to church in Texas and sign me up?
You need southern Jesus
I'm sorry I pissed in your bedroom and then woke you up when I tried to jump off the balcony
Do you think it would be okay if i cleaned my cartilage piercing with the leftover vodka?
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
Randomize
