I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
the cure to his relationship is in or around my vagina.
I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
she's walking around the room telling people she can make the room move with her mind and then she shakes her head really fast yelling 'see?!'
For Halloween this year I'm gonna go as Angelina from Jersey Shore. I'm gonna yell "umm HELLO?!," cockblock someone, then leave the party early
all i asked was if it was all the way in, and now im laying here alone. sensitive guys fucking suck
I just bought condoms at Big Lots. please save this text so you can laugh at me in 9 months
Dude when we asked him where he lived all he could tell us was "by the slurpees." That fucked up.
she has like 12 pairs of underwear people left at her house from the other night
Dude if I call tonight please answer and just say "NO, dont do it."
BAT SHIT CRAZY
It's you're fault, even though I never called
I can assure you I didn't go home with a girl, because I woke up on someone's porch
Started crying to "that's the way it is" by celine. What the fuck uterus?!
I tried sex in a car once. It was like trying to do yoga in a drainage pipe with your arms and legs tied while using a typewriter with your penis.
I JUST REALIZED THAT SINCE LEIA IS TECHNICALLY A PRINCESS AND KYLO REN IS HER SON AND STAR WARS IS OWNED BY DISNEY...KYLO REN IS LITERALLY A DISNEY PRINCE.
Oh my Gods. Why. Why did you have to tell me that. D:
SO YOU CAN SUFFER HAVING THAT KNOWLEDGE TOO.
I am available for nakedness
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