Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
Phosphoglyceraldehydration... why the fuck is this a word
She came in to my room half naked at 3am asking me if I had seen the movie balls deep 7
I haven't been this hungover since you found me laying in front of your door gagging with pepto bismal tablets scattered around me
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
True life. I have to get a nose job due to a deviated septum from blowing coke. Thank you college.
I am too drunk to be out in this weather around all these animals.
I can't believe you picked a finger in the ass over lunch with me.
Stoned in some guys basement listening to ELO. it's like its 1978.
We can get high as fuck when there are no orders. If not its cool. I just figured Take Your Blunt Buddy To Work Day.
I just wanted to be nice to your dick and you are rhyming at me.
you can't tell me not to come to work cause roads are bad then ask me an hour later to come in and expect me to be sober
After dropping your phone on the ground you got down and sat with it, kissed it and apologized for being so mean
Some Romanian guy at work just told me "you come my house, we drink beer and you come make fuck with my sister"
If he's not there watching you go for it. It's been a while bro.
We're pretty sure we got naked at Pride, so running the two blocks to your place in my underwear is a step up the dignity ladder really.
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