im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
youve choked your chicken with your arm asleep and acted like it was some1 else right?
I'm pretty sure "Like A Prayer" will forever remind me of drunk nights & pants down around the ankles
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
are you going to last longer than 15 seconds
nope
my roommate left her license, credit card, and cellphone on her desk. I feel like this is a trap.
No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
If by any chance I go to the hospital make sure you stuff a pint in my pockets so I can keep up.
See this is what happens when we don't have sex everyday
Just caught my dad doing coke in my bathroom again. Guess whose getting a new car for christmasss.
We kept trying to bring you to the hospital but you had a tantrum and kept saying you would never be Miss America
Can't tell if waking up covered in easy mac is the sign of an amazing or terrible night
Oh god, I forgot we had sex to Elton John
If it's any consolation she turned out to be has a collection of clown dolls she talks to crazy. And the cops knew why I was calling when she key locked the door from inside.
Randomize
