Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
No period for spring break; use this wisely.
I'm full of awesome ideas
Yesss you are. Im full of confusion. I keep finding peanut butter on my legs...
I smelled my fingers after she left and they smelt like sugar cookies. I want that one again.
There are walks of shame and then there are walks of what the hell is wrong with you.
hes like my own personal sex toy i use him on the weekends and then i have the option to put him away all week
Bring the cards this coming weekend. If I'm not here I died skydiving Friday
But youre all cute and shit. Woo that cunt. And by cunt i mean strong independent woman
so i guess now we know you can get away with peeing mere feet from the Capitol if you shout IM PREGNANT at the guards
You handed me a red solo cup filled with vodka and Bacon. You called it the salty Russian.
Dude she let me install handle bars on her headboard. I should have nailed my boss years ago.
someone cut his neck open pretty bad with a broken beer bottle. We were so close to his house that we carried him home, but when we got there he casually laid on his bed and said he was just gonna sleep it off. WHO DOES THAT
I'm not sure when I will get off this toilet at work but it's not looking promising
Can I borrow a thong? I’m having drinks with a cute boy tonight and I’m out of clean underwear
Randomize
