And i quote: "where's y'alls from comin' in with them accents?" - from a mississipi mcdonalds
It feels like he gave my taint an indian burn.
Are you for fucking real.? He divorced me just because he got a fucking girlfriend.?!
his dick is like his red hair, amazing but useless
yeah, we figured out that passing a joint between cars was a pretty bad idea
the water pistols in the freezer are full of voddka.
you seemed to enjoy falling down hill
wow, never heard the last few months of my life put so succint
I'm so sick
I would imagine. You did most of your drinking for brazil last night.
That and I think I got food poisoning from sharing nachos with that homeless guy..
I'm glad the semester is over. I need a break from the term "whiskey sharts" coming up so much in conversation.
You were crying in a drunken stupor for an hour because "the new daft punk album didn't blow your tits off"
she walked in on me throwing up in the sink with my pants around my ankles and I said "i'll be with you in a sec"
I met his parents. We played twister. My boob popped out.
No he can't come. I swear to gods he's "Why We Can't Have Nice Things" given physical form.
Knows all the good gay bars AND has a dog? Wtf can't I drop pizza on guys like that????
I guess it's too forward to greet him with a blow job?
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