I thought she would fill the void you created. Turns out she thought I just wanted to fill hers.
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
I hate the hobo that sits outside our building
Joe or Chris?
do i even wanna kno y u kno their names?
well i came home drunk one night and Chris offered me a beer as i was coming in, it was kinda weird but i wasn't goin to deny a free beer. you're proolly talkin about Joe though, he's the one with the fucked up eye.
Got hit on at a funeral service by cougar. I think I just got Reverse Will Ferrell'd.
She said her tits were too big, and he slapped her. He said that Jesus didn't appreciate bitches that fish for compliments
bikini waxes are so much more painful when you know you're not getting laid
No, this time she was diabetic. I think I fucked her into diabetic shock.
She literally crushed my balls between her butt cheeks. It was both the greatest and worst thing ever. Dancers are awesome.
Because if the best sex I've ever had was with a gay guy, then God help me.
They kept barging in on us saying random shit. At one point they came in yelling room service! and threw soda at us bruising my foot. Weirdest injury I have gotten during sex.
It's fine. I wouldn't trust either of them to be my workplace drug buddy.
I think my nap took me to another dimension
I'm kinda glad you won't be in Vegas tomorrow because you'd make us go streaking or throw dead animals at them.
its like i just tried to scrub the hangover off of me.
I admit I fucked your best friend, but to be fair, you fucked the tristate area. So there's a good chance about 40% of those people are MY friends.
Randomize
