nutella sex= disaster
you wanted the guy to gift wrap the condoms
He was singing Justin Beiber while we did it. I love secure Spanish men
you proceeded to scream out that it's your birthday to everyone who walked by before you collapsed in the middle of the street. happy 21st birthday to you.
I have officially had sex in every room on my floor. Don't say I'm not an amazing RA.
he got mad becuase i made more noise when he gave me a back massage then i do when we actually have sex
The guy at the door just stared only at my boobs and said "I'm gonna let you in." 'Merica
He says he invented a new sex move called The Redbird that we can only do when I'm on my period. Should I be concerned?
I just ate a raisin that tasted like wine. Is this real life or is this my body trying to tell me it's Friday and I should be drinking right now?
Let's never forget the time I met you while you were running down the street naked and in handcuffs.
This day took a left turn at "This is your going away party, I got a bunch of blow."
It's his. I know, I'm pregnant with a genetic douche bag but at least he'll be pretty!
Decisions were made. The quality of them will be judged tomorrow
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
She was gone when I unblacked out, but she had nailed her panties to the wall and wrote “Colleen’s Dick”with a sharpie on the wall. No idea where she got a hammer and nail
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