Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
Those balls look pretty dangerous.
She is wearing lilly and pearls while drinking natty from a monogrammed coozie. If that isn't a sorosititue I don't know what is
Sometimes I wonder how you ever made friends then I remember it's because you blew your way to semi-relevance
She thinks I come over for the sex, but I really come for the snacks.
Tell me again your tentative move date. There are 5 Russians in my apartment on ecstasy and they are having a rave in my living room. I can't. I need to move stat
If you go to Tinseltown tonight. First bathroom on the left, second stall. Avoid. It's still coming to terms with what I did to it.
God I need to stop before there's a picture of my dick on my mom's phone.
He won't leave and I need to take a shit and vomit, quite possibly at the same time.
I told him you forbid me to sleep with him so he needs to accept that.
I'm recovering from the blowjob...She's doing her taxes...
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
Im so drunk and the cops showed up so i ran on all 4's through the woods because i had no shoes hoping they would mistake me for a fox
I know you think you’re ready to graduate but just keep these things in mind: taxes, I get up at 5 AM every morning, I have to buy vegetables when I go grocery shopping, and I can’t wear sweat pants to work. Take that victory lap and enjoy the sweat pants and bar hopping because it goes downhill real quick.
I'm sorry for peeing on you last night. Will cookies make up for it?
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