Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
DO IT!!! IT MUST BE FATE THAT I GAVE YOU THAT CONDOM!!!!
imagine if we didn have a dick. we would be so much more productive
I am standing at the lion i publicly humped last night. i am mortified.
if tampons were more like dildos the world would be a better place
I got to the apartment, I was handed a beer within 20 seconds, I'm glowing in the dark, there's fog everywhere, and now I'm wearing a sombrero because apparently it's silly hat night. I never want to leave.
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
No, man, we stole the housekeeper's key and we're just going room to room raiding mini fridges. Hurry
Logan has the vodka and snickers. We're making a run for it. Room 302
Isn't it my whole life blown into this perfect spoon shaped piece of melted and artificially colored sand?
Wow.
Nobody wants to date "Eats Taco Bell Secretly In Her Car" Girl
I agree and I would be an awesome dog
How are you feeling this morning?
Well, I just found day old puke in my bra, so I've been better.
Last night a drunk chick tried to lick me. If you are trying to lick the zombies, you are too drunk for the haunted house.
Tbh.. I hope he still watches our sex tapes so he can be reminded of what he's missing out
Does this cleavage amount say, “Fuck it, I’m over dating, let’s just fuck?”
Randomize
