Cut to me doing the walk of shame to work from a hotel.
ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
we were having sex and the sweat made her make up run... seriously laid there and watched her face just melt into ugly.
Would you be offended if I asked you to smoke a blunt with me while I pooped?
No need to call an exterminator, the ants overdosed on the leftover lines on the counter.
My 16 year old neighbor is throwing a rager cuz her parents are out of town and my brother and I are sitting on the porch listening to A) someone fuck on the trampoline B) a girl bawling about her parents finding out C) someone puking in what we think is the hot tub. And overall we take a shot everytime someone says "bra"
It's okay. I've dumbed down my notes over the semester because I knew I wouldn't be up to understanding things come finals.
CONGRATULATIONS! You have won: pictures of my nipples!
So I almost just died there. And we need a new garage door.
I have a bottle of vodka wrapped in a leg warmer in my purse. This is what it takes to get through Christmas with my family.
I offered the opportunity to grope my boobs for pints. Two girls took me up.
Does the term "on fleek" apply to dicks or just eyebrows?
For 15 minutes straight, he literally did every accent there was, from Russian to Bostonian. The issue: no one could determine whether he was sober, wasted, or anywhere in between
Lmao. K I'll be 100% honest. I was over at your place like 12 hours ago with your roommate. If I hadn't of been there then I'd take you up on your booty call offer. So. If you're not creeped out another time please?
Randomize