so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
he's like a stage 5 clinger and he won't even fuck me. he has to be gay. my personality isn't really THAT great.
you're just mad cause i madeout with you while having a mouth full of chewed pretzels
like the only thing i remember is bringing a piece of toast to the bar...
Wow. I grabbed the wrong container to rinse my contacts- it was a beer. And it comes out waaaay faster than saline.
I hooked up with a guy dressed as Wesley from the Princess Bride. I kept telling him what I wanted him to do and all he would say was "as you wish"
You finished the fifth and then hid two dozen eggs around your apartment and declare that you would "quest for Jesus". Have fun questing today.
I reek of vagina.. My cab driver commented.
you never know what sharing a kayak could lead to
It's true
If Plan B had a rewards card I would have earned so many free tote bags by now
Are you playing pokemon in the dark and sexting? I can't be mad at that.
suburban family judging/laughing at us after Jenna just pulled two flasks out of her boot on the subway
he said to "slap him" after he guessed the time correctly. i did.
She’s either doing coke or thinks my cock has the Covid vaccine. Either way I haven’t worn clothes in 3 days
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