Reminder- he's a douche bag. A big one.
I'm gonna keep this simple. I threw up in your pillow case. Sorry.
Why is there a case of Coors Light with my address on it?
Just a heads up before you get home. Took the shelves out of the fridge so i could fit the beer ball and bucket of riot punch. Apparently i decided the stove was the best place to keep them. They got cooked when we pre heated to cook a bird we shot. This may be the final straw for our security deposit
Beer and cheesecake and spinning in cirlcles why did you let me do this to myself
Do you know anyone with a stuffed cougar? I want one for a self portrait to hang in my house. A bobcat or lynx might work too.
I just threw up in my front yard because my roommate was in the bathroom. Fuck New Years Day.
I'm pretty sure male strippers are the last things I need in my life right now.
My body hates me. Pretty sure I drank 3 pitches full of coffee last night and took two adderal. I slept and ran a marathon at the same time. You should see my bed.
I just felt emotion and I'm not okay with it
We had sex and I never took my mets hat off... I feel like Duda knows and approves.
Why is there multiple peanut butter and toasts stuck to the fridge door?
Just don’t be like me and break up between Christmas and NYE and then get blackout on NYE and puke in your undies.
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
You kept apologizing to your car for talking behind its back
Randomize
