I don't want to talk about it. He was like the Little Engine that couldn't get me off.
I just noticed that when I sneeze...my nipples get hard.
Next time we go to the river, we nominate you to flash people for free booze. Your tits are the biggest.
You said, "can you make out with him for a little bit, I need a break."
Had sex on a washing machine in a pool of beer. Can you say success.
and being hungover still at 4 in the afternoon is NOT "having allergies"
I think I reached optimum potential when I summersaulted straight into a kiddie pool.
No, earlier you attempted Jenga with everyones shoes.
It's just weird. It's like Big Bird dating Meg Griffin.
He hasn't responded, but he probably just jizzed in his shorts again, so I'll give him time.
and I think you ate the old crusty spaghetti on the counter when we came home last night judging by the carnage
Pretty sure I picked a cat up off the street and took him home with me, fed him tuna, then let him go
You called me at 3 am laughing like an idiot. Apparently you consider breaking out of the hospital to be a lifetime achievement.
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
This whole pope visit thing is ruining me having sex.
I called 911 when they kicked me out of the bar last night.
Randomize
