y did u give ur computer a hand job?
id be glad to
I'm pre-party power houring. It's so catchy I couldn't not do it
Don't play hard to get, I've seen some of the girls you've slept with.
dude he was laying on two half-naked chicks, as they rubbed him down with lotion, while rolling a joint. hes like a modern-day african king
I dunno. The only plans I have for sure after finals are smoking a bowl and eating a 5 pound gummy bear. btw I bought a 5 pound gummy bear
There is a positive side to a sinus infection. Exclusively cowgirl sex. I've convinced her I'd pass out if I had to do the work.
All I remember is intermittent flashes of being passed out on the side of the road 3 or 4 different times. And telling him to just leave me there and I would walk home in the morning.
Some guy just showed up at my door to return my bikini top. EXPLAIN NOW
When I go out tonight I need to make sure to be really good. The Easter bunny doesn't deliver to jail
Dude, you stalking his LINKEDIN profile will NOT affect your chances with him. We aren't 40...
Tell me again why we had to Facebook stalk your therapist?
Honestly it was like 3 AM and I only agreed to go to the strip club because I wanted chicken tenders
So after the absinthe shots_____(fill in the blank area for me please)......
I think we might need a safe word for this...
Randomize
