also, made friends with this 75 year old millionaire Tony who likes to mosh. Don't ask.
Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
we are cooking lunchables pizzas on a fire pit.
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
My entire floor is waiting for the couple to come out of the shower. She's a screamer. We've blockaded them
Just took my pill on time for two days in a row. I deserve a prize.
Not having phil's child is good enough.
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
im not even sure if i fucked her just woke up in her closet.
So good!! I became real good friends with an adorable black lesbian couple from Baltimore and a man in a diaper.
I woke up at 5am on my couch, naked, with a cereal bowl of water next to me. Apprently, drunk me thought I was a kitten last night. Super impressed I slept next to the bowl all night and didn't spill a drop.
How do you say, "I love you, but i prefer sex with someone else." in a good way? Ponder that over a jack and coke and get back to me.
I called plan parenthood at 407 am... Guess I was thinking ahead
You do realize it’s only a matter of time before I have a bad day and come home with an alpaca?
Arrived home from picking Mom and Nana up at the airport to find Marc buck ass nude beneath the Christmas tree. Nana says she always knew I was queer.
Randomize
