alone in the kitchen at 4 am eating a hotdog.
He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
It happened again. Now theres even more baby powder and its all over the place, I'm not cleaning that house.
Whatever, the fact of the matter is that I saved you from poorly planned outdoor sex by doing a rain dance and you should totally thank me.
You know how girls with huge tits have back problems? Do you get knee problems or something?
You're a disgrace to the female race and the love triangle and halloween.
Dude she pregamed for her sorority's philanthropy.
He walked door to door asking if anyone needed to get laid. Surprisingly, that ended his drought
Nice just gets you lonely or dead. I don't like those options.
Made out with a chick in front of a girl I'm banging and successfully reDENNISed her within 9 hours
She tried to beat him up using a half gallon of Bacardi, instead she got tangled in Kayla's hanging bra and broke a lamp. She can party with us anytime.
The girl in the stall next to me is puking her brains out, I'd say she had just a good a weekend as us
I gave her some alkaseltzer ad she looked at me lke I was god
Her hookup left his underwear and shorts in the dorm last night... What he was wearing when he left, we may never know.
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
DO IT!
Randomize
