We convinced her the game "just the tip" was a billiards game. She was asking a couple guys if they wanted to play as we left. I kinda don't want to ask her how the rest of the night went.
at least he lost his v-card with a bang... or should i say the clap.
I noticed when you had too much when you were yelling "HOE-HAVE-A-SEAT" to his cat.
$1 margaritas. This happy hour needs to end.
i told him i should keep a toothbrush at his house for after all the times i threw up there. he said yes but i wasnt getting a key to the apt
Might just stay in and drink cuz of the hurricane. Yea I think Wisconsin might be safe but its a good reason to drink.
Alright dude i'm gonna go to go sleep off this soberness. my life is a cosmic joke
He's passed out. He nodded his head when I asked if he's alive though...so there's that
Is it a coincidence that the reminder on my phone to take my birth control is "I'm ready to party" from Bridesmaids?
My ex's new girlfriends ex boyfriend is getting me my nipples pierced for Valentine's Day so who's the real winner here
He couldn't give me an orgasm, but he did give me a UTI.
yeah but really his dick tasted like soap. like i was blowing a bar of soap
I'm not 100 percent on this, but I think I just shit a lump of cement. What the fuck happened last night?
YOU CANT JUST BLOW GUYS BC THEY’RE NICE TO YOU LEXI
I CAN IF I WANT TO
I threw up outside. Then I peed got off the toilet and threw up. While I threw up u pulled up my pants. Not my best moment
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