this guy literally just gave me a gold star sticker for the "stellar" blow job i gave him. ashamed? i think not.
I blacked out, fell off a swingset, and thought I was Liz Lemon for almost an hour.
I hope he's okay, but I also hope he shows up with an eyepatch
it was like having sex with a tree stump
with your vagina and my liver, anything is possible
he said he would handcuff me to his penis. thats not even possible. i want to go home.
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
Seriously though, you almost tore my right nipple off.
I just want to like fall into a pit of hot wings beside a keg of yingling and eat my way to freedom
So I'm guessing that puking on a camper is a straight path to instant termination?
I went from swearing off of sex to planning a threesome. It's been a rollercoaster of a day.
He showed up completely drunk with a 30 of PBR and ten cans of Spam. I like this kid.
How are you and the lady friend?
Well, she's a lunatic, and I love sex, so we're good.
I woke up to him watching me sleep and after I told him it was over he asked if we were still on for Vegas next weekend
100000% expect a picture of my ass in them
Randomize
