Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
i awoke yet another morning with penis breath. ive been so generous santa has to bring me a shit ton of presents
so the party was at my house but some how i ended up being the only one who slept outside
Blew a line and having a jolly rancher... the day is looking up.
the lady at the gas station just thanked me for wearing clothes this time... i am so confused
I have to stop drunkenly making out with guys just because they're tall or have a beard.
hey this is Madison. you gave me your number last night and asked me to remind you that you didn't fuck anyone. you okay?
He bought my favorite ceral.. I've guess I've earn the status as one of his regular fuck buddies. I feel honored and proud. His roommates girls don't get this treatment.
We just had a 30 min argument on the actual birth date of Jesus, it ended in my brother and ain't cursing each other and an 8 yr old answering it by using Siri.
according to the video, you won you first drunken karaoke contest based off of your actual singing abilities and not because you took your shirt! I've never been prouder :)
Halfway through she said I was exactly like she imagined. So many things have been stroked this night.
If I spent my amateur stripper money does that mean I am cleansed of my sins?
He took me out, we slept together, and he sent me home this morning with fresh cantaloupe. #husbandstatus
The orgasm I got from him made me feel almost as good as I imagine the girls in the tampon commercials feel.
He literally just laid flat on top of me motionless at one point. It felt less like foreplay and more like he was trying to use me as a flotation device. 0/10
Randomize
