I'm cheating on the girl I'm cheating on my girlfriend with
if being creepy is wrong, then i don't want to be right
i cant be the least bit upset about his new gf cause all i think is that she has to put things in his ass
he left me a 6 minute video of him peeling a clementine listening to justin bieber
I didn't know people actually cried after sex.
I just did a Kegel and my back popped. My vagina is a gift to penises everywhere.
Is singing the Indiana Jones theme while I put on the condom off limits?
I'm not the one who can lose their erection, so it's fair game
This hurricane better not stop me from sitting on the stoop thurs & enjoying all the slutty costume walkofshamers
At my place... I'm gonna be honest though stonewall Jackson is not going to be able to rally the troops. Too many shots of tequila
I'm going to miss hockey season. It was the best excuse to get drunk on a Tuesday night.
Just got road head. In broad daylight. On the interstate. During rush hour. Pushing the envelope one public bj at a time.
All I want to do is ice my pussy, but then my husband would probably infer that I was not at a business meeting last night.
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
I think it might be the guy sitting next to me. I've concluded he HAS to be smuggling insane amounts of onions in his wardrobe to smell like that
I'm literally trying to cool beer down right now in my car by putting it on my floor and blasting cold air on it
Randomize