Whoa Z and x make the same sound
At least with the last gf I made it clear that I wanted to breakup when I pissed on her floor @ 3am as her roommate watched in contempt
had to check his id this morning to remember his name.... i was wayy off
I cut holes in my blanket and put my arms through it. It's the sleeveless "Bro Edition" Snuggie.
I think the secretary can hear it when I fart in the bathroom, how do you think she feels about that?
Things I have that belong to you: shorts, headband, bra, purse, chinese food, vodka, and blood on my jeans. Happy homecoming.
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
And I was chasing apple pie moonshine (provided by cops) with bud light limeys. In a golf cart, wearing a tiara.
Almost just bought a peacock. I need to get off Craigslist
Saxophones in my mind. I swear someone dosed me.
We got high and watched Winnie the Pooh. Isn't that what every normal person does on their break?
You asked to borrow my glasses for a moment. Then you whipped them at someone's head.
Ladies don't puke and tell
Sorry if that was awkward, i will never call you sober ever again
That awkward moment when you realize you've been secretly blackout dating someone for three months. Drunk me is in a committed relationship.
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