Do u think she knows her nickname is the oompa loompa
i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
i wish that i had sketchier friends so that it would be easier to get drugs
I had sex on an exercise ball. The inevitable has occurred.
It's like being the dunk pilot of a plane full of pornstars and drunkenness.
She peed in the limo. She stood up and pulled up her dress and peed on the floor of the limo.
Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.
i just want to be sober by dinner like is that too much to ask
rigging a system to keep my jello shots cold in class. important election day work.
He told me that his favorite part about me is hearing my voice while we fuck. I think that was the nicest thing he has EVER said to me.
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
Screaming "dámelo" at the bottle of scotch was definitely my best and worst moment of Cinco de Mayo 2015.
Places I vomited today: hotel bathroom, in the cab to the airport, airport bathroom, airport terminal trashcan, plane seat 18E, and the plans bathroom
Fun wedding?
Yes. Very.
But the real reason your aunt is drunk crying is because she has already had four margs and went for a 5th and someone is trying to stop her
Randomize
