Okay, I have a threesome with foreigners and suddenly I'm a man-whore
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
He tipped the stripper with quarters. After that not even the waitress would talk to us. I had to move to another table to get a lapdance
worst part about day drinking... waking up to george lopez
There needs to be a crayon color for how blue my balls are
Just got home and found him passed out with his ass stuck in a Rubbermaid garbage can. He must have been like that for a few hours
I woke up to him pissing in their fireplace with fairy wings on.
Romney sounds like a middle school girl and that creepy ass smile makes me want to close my blinds
She was grinding on him and then she was eating a Big Mac. Who the hell brings a Big Mac to the club?
I got high with the cantor. Rethinking this whole non-practicing Jew thing.
So apparently someone caught him as he was falling. And carried him around the rest of the night.
They made up a new version of "Smash or Pass" called "I would(n't) let you sit on my face" to yell at the freshman
You sent me a naked picture of you as a child? How is that normal
My cat just tried to lay on my stomach while I was masturbating. And I let her because I am so starved for affection.
You full on peed your pants then resurrected yourself like Jesus Christ...
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