I thought spray tan was a myth
?
You know, something that only happens in Jersey
And hes hitting me with his balls, really hard.
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
He gave me a pearl necklace on top of my Karma necklace I was wearing. I guess I deserve whats coming to me.
There's so much relief when you realize you wake up in your own bed
Every once in a while you'd chuckle to yourself, and when I asked you what's so funny u replied "sometimes my toes tickle eachother"
Also there's a dick sized hole in my tights...should I be worried?
Thanks for coming to the hospital with me, In return, I will buy you ecstasy.
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
Woke up in the ER with a nurse holding my tongue together inside of my mouth and a shattered jaw, the last thing I remember is opening the 151, care to fill me in?
somebody went from crying while watching Full House, to a full on emotional raging bull...I love this time of the month
I WANT PIZZA BUT I ALSO WANT SELF ESTEEM
BUT LIKE WHO AM I TO EVER CARE ABOUT SELF ESTEEM
My glasses were in the garbage this morning
Oh my god. We just got locked out of our cabin and went to the neighbor's to see if they had a key and caught the neighbor jerking it. My night > your night
I find him attractive in the absolute weirdest way. Like I need him to do my taxes, but I also feel like I should spill things on him to gain his attention and then lick it off to gain his affection.
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