I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
I should be nowhere even remotely near facebook in this condition.
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
while you've been gone this has kinda turned into some sort of fivesome-type thing. just thought i should warn you for when you get back
I was really sad when you left and cried. And i don't know what a face promise is, but apparently i made you make one.
You have to stop getting hammered and preaching about that mission trip to Haiti.
It's ok for me to have his baby but I can't be his friend on fb. Wth is wrong with this
Can you please tell him to stop calling me ma'am? I'm starting to remember what it's like to have self respect
I don't know at which point last night turned terribly, terribly wrong, but it was somewhere around Motel 6, specifically the parking lot.
You grabbed the hot guy that was making out with his girlfriend all night, slurred "I need to borrow this" then shoved your hand down his pants. All because you thought your ex walked into the bar. It was majestic in its shitshowness.
the first cop to show up was this girl who hooked up with our home ec teacher in high school, she knows about questionable decisions
Look, sometimes you have to snapchat a topless photo of yourself in the middle of class just to prove you can. I can and I did. End of argument.
Nothing says "I Love you" like my dick in a pizza box
Just got offered bathroom sex. I've never been more flattered.
I know I'm not a hook-up kind of chick but he is a firefighter & an EMS worker. I felt like maybe I'd be a good person if I let a good person inside of me
Randomize
