all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
Just pure bliss will emerge from Charles, my tranny bong.
So i think i'm going to frame my summons tickets and give them to dad as a christmas present...
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
I woke up in an empty bathtub with the wrong brother
I have to sanitize my nipples and its just to cold in here for it to be ok
Wanna get really high and go on a Valentine's Day Sexathon cause we're both single or would that be weird?
I just remember looking over and seeing you on top of him and us high fiving. That's when I knew we'd be perfect roommates
I feel like the only way to get him to stop is by telling him i'm tired from fucking our other friend every night this week
id one day like to live in a world full of emotionless and wonderfully fullfilling sex...
He danced with some other girls and you started yelling "I can't believe I wasted half my Chili's gift card on you" at him
She started snoring post sex, so I drunkenly walked 8 miles at 4am to go fishing. Please come pick me up
Everybody posting sickening holiday couple pics and I'm over here deepthroating a bottle of whiskey.
I just ate a handful of salt
I thought this was a good idea
But I put cranberries and apples in my wine so it's festive drinking not suicidal drinking
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