Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
i got turned down by a girl after she saw how big my penis was and she said "thats not goin in me"
I just gave my patient permission to swallow while pregnant. She was so embarrassed to ask...but her bf was really happy with the answer.
As I was going down on her I noticed she had a tatoo on her inner thigh that said "Eat it like your birthday cake".
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
Every time I hit my bowl my neighbors set off fireworks... I stop, they stop. I start again, they start again. Too high for this.
Dude. Hurry up. They just blessed the tequila.
Dipping doritos in Grey Poupon. Why does no one treat me like the lady I am?
Craig, a bottle of Jamison, and I had a party on the roof last night. No idea how I got down. My injuries indicate fall...
When this bachelor party is over and your life is in ruins, you have my permission to die.
I asked him why the bed was wet and got.."well there are two options... and its not you."
ugh i want to get waxed but I’m afraid. my vagina has had enough trauma this week, i don’t know if I can put her thru any more.
I told him I wanted to get on him and ride him to Montana. It didnt end like i thought it would.
just found the "let's take a picture before we do these roommates" before picture
thank god there was never an after picture.
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
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