You better have your party panties on Saturday!
Why only Saturday?
Well I have an AA meeting Sat morning so I'm going to try to take it easy Fri.
He was in me and said I can't believe this happened because of facebook. MOOD KILLER.
She is a social worker. An actual good person trying to save the world. I feel like every time I give her an orgasm God wipes a little smudge off of my shit list.
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
They're pole dancing on a handicap sign post.
I woke up in nothing but a shower cap and your sparkling coke straw snorter thing inbetween my toes. Explain.
We waved. But it was a "let's hook up" wave.
Would it be sharing too much to tell you that my nipples hurt so much that I couldn't comfortably go down the stairs?
NOT EVEN KIDDING RIGHT NOW. THE GUY IN THE SPIDERMAN COSTUME JUST FELL OFF THE ROOF INTO A BABY POOL. GET HERE NOW!!
orgasmnado...tomorrow night
That's what I'm talking about
the only thing she has in her apt so far is toilet paper and shot glasses. you can see where the priorities lie.
But how MUCH of an emergency? Like, should I go to the ER now, or can it wait until after the bar crawl?
I swear to god if I have to repeat this to you one more mother fucking time I will flip fucking shit and acidic rain will pour down upon your mother fucking soul
I came so hard I literally levitated off the top of his dick. Gravity was no match for that orgasm!
My professor just asked for my number. Not fucking her till after finals though I learned my lesson last time.
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