It's not my fault I help girls realize they're lesbians.
I thought about donating plasma but thats not the way i want to find out that i have aids
The goblet must only be used for good. And vodka. And anything t-pain would be proud of.
I'm questioning the dried chocolate syrup on my tits.
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
Im pretty sure it started going awry when I asked their mom "How much would it cost me to sleep with your daughters"
I feel like everyone would be happy with that as a present too. "Oh you got me pussy for Christmas?! How'd you know?!"
Honestly the war on drugs is dumb and you can just sleep in my bed which is mega comfortable anytime you want. There I said it
he was very distressed by my statements that there could have been balls on shoulders without awareness
When I tried to give you a hickey, you karate chopped me in the neck.
We got way too high so we're sitting in the parking lot of the movies trying to figure out what bar to go to
Not my type, but the penis looks fun.
I cannot lay down. I will throw up my life and your life and the class hamster I had in third grade.
He has no idea he’s my boyfriend.
Plus you need some new dick in your life, the environment is fucked enough you don’t have to recycle anymore 😂💀
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