Ahhh... Adderall running out my nose in the shower really brings back memories.
I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
you're close to getting here right? Because if you're still not here and I have to get dressed to answer the door for the pizza guy, i'm tipping him $100 on your credit card to spite you
I can't tell if I miss summer or 5 times a day sex more.
Fuck him for salsa, please. I heard its a good recipe.
I told him to pick up the beer can he threw in front of the police station. So he gets out chugs whatever's left and throws it back and says ok let's go.
Look at you go. You're like the Slutty Librarian that Could. They should write children's books about you. Children's books for adults.
A man just squeezed past me in a tight space and said, "Excuse us."
I can't remember dinner
Hahaha "rub in the ketchup on your face, It'll just look like blush." some gay waiter said that to you, and you go "good idea!"
This guy is trying to get me to do some acrobatic gymnast shit just so he can see "my tight hole." I'm too big to be sweating in my own damn bed. Shittttt.
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
Omg the world wants us to be better people
I refuse
We both fell asleep mid-handjob and he continued to call it "handjob halftime".
Whatever. I'll take my new fine ass dick sucking nails elsewhere.
immediately after sex he started talking to me about nerdy stuff he meant to text me earlier, I'm completely smitten
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