both the worst and best vomit ever... it was extra chunky and thick cause of the sausage... but it also tasted like delicious sausage... also cause of the sausage
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
we started pounding beers an hour ago to celebrate our personal snow day tomorrow. vodka shots for u of i's actual decision are on standby.
I woke up and took my shirt off, and there was what I was assume to be pieces of tree in my chest hair. Any ideas about that one?
Im also drinking whiskey while on a treadmill wearing high heels so let's consider that for a moment.
What do you mean how did you end up there? You told him he had a face you'd like to ride, that's a deal sealer in any language.
Long story short, the rash from your last birthday party told me not to go to this one.
For Valentine's Day I've purchased six lighters and I'm decorating them for him. I'm on a full ride to an art school and this is what I'm using my talents for. An intervention is needed. Please stop letting me date stoners.
I just used a baby fork as a roach clip. I am totally the cool aunt.
I also got a mission for you and you're gonna love it. Biggest. Hospital. Party. Ever.
I met her daughter,who I went to high school with on my way out this morning. She didn't seem to surprised. I love older women.
I'm giving random strangers at the bar sips of my fishbowl, then telling them I have Ebola. It's a fun night.
its 11:20. i'm drunk in class flying paper airplanes for my final. what the fuck is my college experience right now?
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
Have you actually looked at the corn flakes box? I don't think the rooster has a soul.
Randomize
