Their was just 7 people standing outside eating a costco chicken, definitley at the right party
I would feel bad sleeping with her unless all of her personalities were on board with it.
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
You showed them your nipple for dollars for the jukebox. You were depressed because only one of your songs played. Oh then you twisted your ankle and blamed it on your mad stripper skills.
No shame in my game.
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
No, seriously, I've slept with 3 guys this month.
It's ok, February is a short month
He said I act like a cross between a kindergartener and a high 70 year old man. Which is inacurate because it fails to account for the disco obsession.
After owing so much in back child support they should make vasectomy a mandatory
Never thought going to McDonald's alone at 3 AM would end with a blowjob outside some random girl's apartment...
he won't tell me his last name, but I know his garage key code
You can't honestly expect me to maintain an erection when you have the Glen Beck show on
He and his ex stood there talking about going to get Chinese food while I was half naked searching for my panties
Lets just say the phase, What a dick, has a whole new meaning at the urinals.
As a gift to myself for being so awesome at being single, I'm going to buy a vibrator
I'm a freaking penguin. one mate for life, and really awkward at parties
Randomize
